There’s nothing sexier than confidence – feeling relaxed and at home in your own skin, and ready to face any challenge that comes along head-on. If you think about your own personal world’s sexiest people list; whether they’re actors, singers, models, writers or academics – what do they all have in common? They believe in their right to take up space, they value their talents, and they know what they have to offer. The good news is that all of that takes place in the mind first… meaning you’ve got the power to nurture those same feelings and beliefs in yourself! Here’s how.
Really accept compliments
Many of us have a tendency to brush off compliments, mumbling a humble little thank you while secretly not believing a word we’re hearing. The next time someone compliments your hair, what you’re wearing, praises you for a job well done or thanks you for lending a hand, take a moment to actually hear what they’re saying, and accept their word as the truth! Let it sink in, hug it to your chest, and allow yourself to believe it!
Use science!
Guys, did you know that women will find a man more attractive if he uses metaphorical language to compliment them? If you want to boost your confidence with the ladies, then start working on some pretty turns of phrase. Another way you can instantly boost your confidence and appeal is by working on your posture and body language. Power poses have been found to elevate testosterone levels and decrease cortisol levels – making you feel more powerful and confident. If you want to be perceived as a superhero, stand like one.
Explore your sexuality
Getting back in touch with your body is a great way to boost confidence, whether you book a nice massage, have a long soak in the bathtub followed by an all-over moisturizer, or give yourself a foot and neck rub. If you have a partner and want to work on your confidence in the bedroom, then invest in some naughty adult toys to play with together! You’ll learn more about each other and yourself while broadening your sexual horizons and gaining confidence all at the same time.
Role play
If you’re reentering the dating game after being away for a while, it can be really daunting to work up the nerve to go up to a stranger and spark a conversation! One technique that’s been shown to help is to emulate a confident character who you’d like to be a little more like. Whether it’s your favorite femme fatale or that ultra-confident ladies’ man from a classic film, step into their shoes and make believe. You really can ‘fake it ‘til you make it’!
Get your heart racing
Sadly, we’re talking about the less exciting angle here – exercise! Hitting the gym, going for a run or lifting weights all release endorphins, feel-good chemicals that elevate your mood and give you an all-natural confidence boost. As an added benefit, feeling stronger and fitter leaks over into your self-image too. If you’re not a fan of getting into too much of a sweat, yoga is a great way to improve flexibility and get those limbs feeling all supple and limber, and who knows how useful that could end up being? Wink!
Learn something
Feeling competent and equipping yourself with useful new skills is another great way to boost your self-esteem, as you’ll feel better prepared to take on new challenges, and confident that you have the tools to back you up. Pick something that’s challenging and tests your limits a little without being overwhelming. It could be overcoming your fear of public speaking through joining a Toastmasters club, going to watch a motivational speaker, or enrolling in self-defense lessons.
Be a little daring
If you’re with a partner, spice things up a little with some light PDA the next time you’re out and about together, read a racy novel in public, or go all out and finally get around to doing that skydive! Embracing a little fear can work wonders for your self-confidence.
Smile!
Make an effort to smile when you greet people, whenever you walk into a room, and even at yourself in the mirror when no-one’s watching. Appearing happier and more approachable warms people’s feelings towards you, and everyone feels good when they feel liked and included.
Have a girls or guys night out
Getting dressed up just for the sake of it is a great way to give your spirits a much-needed lift. Wear an outfit you absolutely love, make a little extra effort to pamper yourself, and take on the town feeling like a million bucks!